Children, you are either about to go back to school, or you started last week.  I bet your parents took a picture of you and your bright smile, empty backpack, and new sneakers on the front porch.  Kids, your parents took that picture because they wanted a record of the high hopes they have for you this year.  That picture represents your potential for a fresh start, and a forgetting, if you will, of everything that might have gone wrong last year. For both you and your folks, a new school year means a chance for you to leap to the head of your class and shine like your parents know that you can.

With that completely unrealistic parental pressure now upon you, here are a few tips to at least surviving, if not excelling at, your new grade.

1. Be nice to your teachers.  It sounds simple, doesn’t it?  Parents often hear, “Mr. X doesn’t like me,” as a reason why you are maybe not doing so well in his class.  Kids, if Mr. X doesn’t like you, it’s probably because you did something that ticked off Mr. X.  Don’t do the same thing this year with Mr. Y.
2. Your Physical Education teacher can’t really grade you on how good of an athlete you are (or aren’t—phew), so your effort in class and ability to follow the rules are going to count for a lot, and one rule counts more than most:  Keep your P.E. uniform clean. Your parents, classmates, and teacher will appreciate it more than you know.
3. Sit in the front of the class.  Obviously, not everyone can follow this tip.  But at least make an effort to do this in your more difficult classes.  There’s a reason why the “smart” kids are always in front, and it doesn’t have anything to do with IQ.
4. Parents don’t like surprises.  That means everything from massive projects due the next day, to less than stellar grades showing up unexpectedly on report cards.  Keep your parents in the loop–overdose them with information if you have to—and you’ll find that they really are your allies.
5. Your hair looks great.  I swear.  It’s time to leave now.  You’re going to be late.  Please come out of the bathroom right now.  We’re leaving.  You’re gorgeous/handsome.  Have a great day/semester/year!

This entry was posted on September 05th, 2009 and is filed under Mother Tongue. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.

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